Confusion

Sometimes I am just so confused.about what I want, what I feel, who I am, and who I want to be. I feel almost as confused and depressed as when I was a teenager, without all the hope, enthusiasm, and possibilities to look forward to. I never thought i'd feel this way at my age. It kind of really sucks

Truth

There really isn't such a thing, except possibly numerically...

Why am I surprised

Or at least dissapointed when someone whom I know is a pathological liar doesn't follow through on their promises?

Being the person I used to be

After the massive implosion of my last relationship I'm not really sure where to go or what to do to get back to who I am.I'm not even sure it's possible, or that I want to be that person again, at least not completely. I feel almost like I'm whining, like I'm back being a teenager where everything is a crises and the end of the world. But the truth is I am messed up, partially broken, and definitely not someone I'd set a friend up with. But how do I fix me? Or can I?

At what point in their life

Does someone decide to pretend to be someone or something that they are not? how does someone wake up one day and think, you know, I think I'll make up a very complicated set of lies and exaggerations about myself and tell them to multiple people I know. And think this won't be found out. Do they not realize that when it is found out that they will be a thousand times worse off than if they'd stuck with the truth, even if it was boring? If you are unhappy with who you are, wouldn't it make more sense to spend all those brain cells and energy becoming who you want to be?

Not sure

Which hurts me most. That I don't have some to love, or that the relationship I had was a lie

Trying

To run my crazy life is a lot like herding a bunch of mentally impaired cats...